My January Book Club recommendation is the “The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body In the Healing of Trauma” by Bessel Van Der Kolk, M.D.

I was recommended this book early on in my trauma healing journey. I have read this book in stages because the intense complexity of the information can be overwhelming to focus or even triggering. However the importance of what I now know from reading this book is life changing.

“Trauma is a fact of life…he uses recent scientific advances to show how trauma literally reshapes both body and brain, compromising sufferers’ capacities for pleasure, engagement, self-control, and trust. Based on Dr. Van Dee Kolk’s own research and that of other leading specialists, “The Body Keeps the Score” exposes the tremendous power of our relationships both to hurt and to heal—and offers new hope for reclaiming lives.”

Not only do I understand trauma better but I have been able to apply the idea that it’s is okay to not be okay. In the past when my child would see me cry and ask if I was okay I would respond, “Yes I am fine” knowing that I am not. Now I know it is healthy to respond “I am personally doing okay but I am sad” or “I am having a moment and need some space for myself.” I am a amazed how naturally they completely understand my response and there is no benefit in protecting them from seeing me allow my body to react appropriately. And usually I get a great big hug because that is how we can show support and care in a situation we can’t take away the feelings. I know I am teaching them it’s okay to feel. There are no bad emotions and that their intuition to recognize that something may be wrong with me is spot on. They also get to know that it is not healthy or real to always be okay.

I love reflecting back on how my body has kept the score and how true this statement is. Specifically before I knew the truth with hard evidence my brain had to make sense of the truth presented before me even though it didn’t make sense yet my body and soul knew something was wrong.

I have always tried to listen to my body and now I know just how valuable this is because my body is loyal to me!

What has your body told you?

You can our use the book for $13.26 on Amazon. https://www.amazon.com/Body-Keeps-Score-Healing-Trauma/dp/0143127748