Climbing my first big mountain was the scariest, hardest and at times felt like the slowest journey of my life. Reaching the summit and looking back from the top at times has brought me to tears of joy, happiness, relief and hope.

I had been warned that there would always be a mountain on the horizon still to climb because new things would surface and it has absolutely been true.

They have appeared while sifting through decades of memories when they come to light. That combined with the latest hurdles can at times be difficult. But now I trust better what I observe and I have the tools how to handle it. The cycles of abuse effect me less and for shorter amounts of time. I fear less his consequences and expect that when it’s calm I preventatively brace for the anticipated big storm.

I can sort through the manipulation, control, blaming and gaslighting that worked on me our whole marriage and instead have the confidence that I don’t have to take it anymore. These are more like hills than mountains and the task is daunting but doable.

I know when an old memory seeps out that with my clear lens of truth it is still painful but I can work through it quicker especially with the help of others that I love.

Some wisdom I gained from my first training is that I know there are angels helping me and by my side. I know the nagging knots in my stomach eventually subside. I know I am worth so much more than he wanted me to believe. I know I can ascend again and again because I’ve already conquered the biggest ridge before.

What have you learned after climbing your biggest mountain? Are you still trying to get to the crest? Are you able to recognize the progress instead of focus on the perfection? What have you learned that has helped you face what is in front of you still?

You can do this! We can do this! And I promise the phrase “it gets better with time” may seem still unbelievable but it is wholeheartedly true.

#hope#betrayaltrauma#conquer#joy#relief#divorce#addiction#healing#gaslighting#emotionalabuse#abusecycle#blameshifting