Gaslighting

Gaslighting is the name of some of the emotional abuse that occurred in my marriage. It comes from the 1944 movie “Gaslight.”

The definition is a “form of psychological manipulation in which a person… covertly sows seeds of doubt in a targeted individual, making them question their own memory, perception, or judgment, often evoking in them cognitive dissonance and other changes such as low self-esteem.“

Seeing now how the person I trusted the very most was doing this to me overwhelms my heart, brain, and soul.

I now look in the mirror and know that I am a different person than he told me. He compromised his integrity of who he proclaimed to be and ignored it to protect his ego and addiction. I know those are his choices alone and has nothing to do with me.

I feel he didn’t see me as an equal but valued me for the illusion I helped create as we were viewed from the outside in as “normal and healthy.”

My strengths and talents helped hide his lies and the deception he needed to create so others would see him the way he hoped. And in the process I also believed the lies too and even worse was that any problems were all my fault.

He came up with lies and excuses that my soul fought to believe yet my brain was forced to make sense and believe its false truth.

With hard work, time, therapy and learning healing tools,

I can see my past for the truth it is now.

Have you experienced gaslighting in a relationship?

I can understand and help validate what you are feeling. I have been there before.

Click in the link in bio to schedule a free 20 min Zoom call or email me at marnibown@gmail.com to make an appointment.