Mother’s Day for most women seems to be the most dreaded holiday. We take a moment instead to evaluate ourselves of how we are failing instead of how we are doing our best everyday.
Mother’s Day for me has been often bittersweet because I am reminded of the losses I have experienced in even just having an adult relationship with my mom. I value her short life she lived and I want to emulate it. To me my mom was mostly perfect most of the time in almost every category. But in my moms journals I read her feelings of inadequacy, failure and her insecurities in her roles as a mom, wife, friend, sister and woman. She still felt all this with the real unconditional love of my dad by her side and her knowledge that she is a daughter of God. I am so thankful for those journals because it validates the feelings I feel about myself at times too.
Satan loves to tell us lies. I love this list I refer to often of discerning my feelings if they are from God or the adversary. Because of my trauma my mind is often confused with so many emotions and this gives me clarity.
I also love @tiffany.webster and her ideas and explanations on Me + Christ = More. Me feeling like if I can just do more, try harder or be more perfect then I am closer to being like Christ is false and it is impossible and exhausting! Instead I am learning I am enough who I am TODAY! Even if it’s not my most spiritual, happy or productive day. We need to align with God so we feel our worth to help us each day. We weren’t asked to be perfect but Satan knows if he can overwhelm and discourage us we can feel defeated and not even want to try.
This last years Mother’s Day was the first after my discovery. What my children did for me was the most precious experience to date. I have never been more thankful for the opportunity to be their mom. Sadly in the past I felt bad for them that I was their mom. Now I knew I had done the best I could, a lot of it alone and I did it!! Their words in their card are still treasures to me because of all that we had been through. And they planned and prepared a perfect day for me all on their own. I was overcome with so much love and I had a moment I allowed myself to feel that even God is proud of me.
Here is a link to “The Perfect Lie” by Tiffany Webster.
You are enough! Every effort we give each day is enough. And we can’t be upset about our decisions in the past with the information we have now. Because at the time we were doing the best we knew how. Our best isn’t measured by anyone else’s best.
Give yourself a hug today!! And send someone else a virtual hug.