In some of my hardest times I have been challenged how I can still believe in God because He knew what choices he was making and God didn’t warn me.

As a teenager I had already felt that although my mom had worked hard to live a healthy life and prevent a genetic cancer, Gods law still took her life way too young. But all that I learned in that sadness helped me become a stronger person and closer to God.

Over two decades later later it would be the free agency of my husband that caused the devastating changes in my life. It felt very unfair and I did search for God.

Early on it was through my children, family and friends I felt Him the most. When the numbness started to wear off, I was able to really ponder and reflect. I saw God very present in past and current life. I could see where I was always blessed and so were my children. So many of my efforts and prayers were answered with blessings despite the years of his choices I didn’t know. God prepared me the best I could before a massive D-day. I learned that He has a plan for me better than I could imagine. He has never left my side.

Part of this new process I have prayed to see the miracles in my life. They happen more often than I would have ever thought. I love looking at my landscape in life and knowing it is the peaks and valleys that make it the most beautiful and meaningful.

I love where I stand today because there is no doubt God is very aware. The way I get to experience gratitude because of the dark spaces I have been are worth it. I would absolutely go through it all again to get where I am today.

Where have you seen God in your life?

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