2019 began my journey on learning to FLY! For me it stands for First Love Yourself.
I literally have had to change the way I think about myself and be gentle in my healing journey. After betrayal trauma and feeling so disposed of I also noticed my constant negative self talk and how it needed to stop! I noticed I feared crying and not being okay because that was how I had to be for the last 21 years. I had adapted to an unhealthy environment and was surviving everyday. Now stepping out of the “Fun House mirrors” and seeing the health risks, emotional abuse, financial abuse, sexual abuse, manipulation and stonewalling he created for me and my children it is almost too much to take in. I thought he was the most selfless person when really his choices were the most selfish in the new truth
How could I be so deceived? How did I not know earlier? Why did I trust him so much? Why did I think it was a good marriage? There are so many questions that now I am okay that I don’t have the answers. And because he is not forthcoming and I know I only know a sliver of the truth, new truths continue to surface and I have had to stand my ground that there isn’t any new information that would change why I chose to leave. My truths and what I know without a doubt is enough!
I started the year out in the negative and have only been climbing out and up..higher and higher each day. I am happier today than I was last year before I even knew the truth.
am excited about my new journey and what opportunities lie ahead in more podcasts, and speaking and teaching opportunities. I am also working as a support to Betrayal Trauma and the fight against pornography. New doors are opening and I love helping others and giving back because so many are and were there for me. I felt strongly to share my story and even if my heart break can be a way to offer one person a pair of wings to help them FLY, it was worth it. Thank you all for your love and support in my healing journey. You are all my tribe!! Cheers to 2020!!